[List] 30.1 A list of things you anticipate.

[ooc: Set pre-escape, post-Peter's arrival 'cause that's more fun. *g*]

*scratched on a piece of paper, then discarded*

- Elle's next visit
- Escaping this cell
- Tearing this place apart
- Killing Bob
- Killing Victoria
- Killing Kaito
- Killing Daniel (Note: Apparently taken care of)
- Killing Angela
- Releasing the virus
- Getting the boy to actually talk to me
- Convincing the boy to get us the hell out of here
- Something more interesting to read

[10spot] 111. TEN people you tried to help but hurt instead.

1. Peter
2. Hiro
3. Angela
4. Yaeko
5. Arthur
6. Victoria
7. Kaito
8. Charles
9. Nathan
10. Myself

(no subject)

30 years: torture, boredom, sex, repeat.

[MI] June, week 4

I have no doubt that we will be successful in harnessing the sun's energy.... If sunbeams were weapons of war, we would have had solar energy centuries ago. ~Sir George Porter, quoted in The Observer, 26 August 1973

Never a truer statement, and not just in this day and age. Nearly every major technological innovation has come from research for military applications first. Now, yes, this at the end of the day benefits us all, but couldn't it be nicer if we just funded scientists to do things that would benefit humanity instead of having the whole "let's find better ways to kill each other" rigmarole first?

But that's how it has always been. The country with the strongest military force has the most power, and humanity as a whole craves power. So we race to arms, we race to get nuclear missles, we race to get to space, we build better satellites, bigger bombs, more secure intelligence...all in the name of "defense" because if we don't do it, the other guy will, and then he'll walk all over us, and we'll lose our way of life.

Things like green energy, environmentally sound practices, conserving instead of wasting--it's still the talk of the radicals though more and more people are giving lip service to it. But for all the recycled cartons we buy, and hybrid cars we decide to drive, it still serves no military purpose anyone can see, and so the research lags behind.

The day someone discovers how to make a bomb run on sunlight, that's the day solar energy will start to be widely available for everyone.

[CT] 20.1 Fatal Attraction [Locked]

It started out so very innocent. We were both young, both longing for adventure, and together we found it. Something new--a chance for him to live out the stories he heard as a child, and for me to find some meaning in my life again after I had lost everything. It was friendship, it was camaraderie, it was something I had never expected to experience, to feel, again.

But then it changed, and it got dark, and he betrayed me, and I betrayed him, and I made a vow, a promise. I swore that as long as I lived, I would lay waste to everything he held dear. That he would suffer.

It was...I cannot say, truly, if it could have been mended, then, or not, but whatever might have come--he left. He left and the stories grew of Kensei and his princess, lies woven with truth to make a tale far prettier than the real one. And I went on, and I let the betrayal and the hatred and the anger become so much a part of me I sometimes wonder if they can be undone, even with the vast expanse of time stretching out before me.

I killed his father. He buried me alive. We're bound together, destinies entwining, and even when he is dead and gone, I doubt that I will be free of it.

[FM - IJ] Love is a temple, Love the higher law

1977

Is it getting better?
Or do you feel the same?
Will it make it easier on you now?
You got someone to blame
You say
One love
One life
When it's one need
In the night
One love
We get to share it
Leaves you baby if you
Don't care for it

He pressed his hand against the glass, watching it reflected back off of the blinds that were open. The blonde man sitting on the bed reading looked up, startling blue eyes seeming to pierce through the window and layers of flesh, stripping away the few defenses Charles carried with him and looking to his soul underneath. It was always unnerving, but now he could see the depths of those eyes, could glimpse the flickers of a sort of madness that he had always taken for intense passion, before. It burned almost too hot, the fervor there, before the mask dropped again, and there was nothing but ice gazing back out at him. He nodded at the guard, then moved into the room, the cell, the place where they had locked up their leader, each of them playing Judas in turn, horror in their eyes at what he had almost done, though Charles knew most of them would have backed him if they weren't afraid of the same fate. Their eyes, too, held the fever glimpsed in Adam's.

It was a fervor he had believed in, until it turned dark, and standing in the cold, sterile room, watching as Adam leaned back against the wall of his prison, head tilting, one eyebrow arching in cool curiosity, Charles felt the loss of it with a keen edge that cut through him.

"I thought we were going to save the world."

"That was the plan," Adam said dryly, "Until Kaito interfered."

"You went too far."

"There is no such thing. Just because you cannot see it..." Adam shook his head. "This isn't about that, even. He wanted my position, and now he has it, just like his son before him."

Charles frowned, confused by the latter statement, but let it pass. "You can't blame him, Adam. You have to accept responsibility for your own actions."

Adam's mouth tightened, the only sign of his displeasure, and then his eyes slid back to his book, effectively dismissing Charles, who still stood there for quite a while longer, before he finally turned to go.

1987

( Did I disappoint you? )