[MtM] July: What is the hardest decision you've ever made? [Filtered--see note]

[ooc note: Locked/filtered to those who know he did it on purpose, not just suspect. Like, he's confessed to your muse or something. Otherwise, you're not on the filter and mun knowledge only. This is not his grand mea culpa. He might even be lying, who knows? He does that. :-)]

Dropping the vial.

What? Did you think it would be something else? Did you think that I came to that decision easily, either back then or now? Do you think I hold life so lightly that I didn't think about the cost, didn't fully realize what I was doing? Do you think I'm that mad, that blind with power, that overly ambitious, that desperate to be adored that I'd pay any price?

I know some of you do, but if you think so, you'd be wrong.

It was not a decision I made lightly or frivolously. It made me sick to think of it, even, to know the destruction it could wreak across the globe. I could make some choices, yes, save those I loved, save those I could get to in time, but I knew far too well that it would be a catastrophe the likes of which the Earth had never seen. Worse than the Black Plague, and I know that well--I lived through the Great Plague of London which killed over a fifth of London's population. So, you see, I knew what I was doing, what my choice, my decision would mean, and I grieved for it.

( But I did it anyway. )

Meta: Conversation between headmates because mun was going nuts and had to write it out

[After/At the same time as this conversation/flirtation with Illyria]

Wesley: You were flirting with her.
Adam: ...So?
Wesley: Don't.
Adam: Or what?
Wesley: *cocks a gun, points it at his head*
Adam: Don't you think that's a bit on the extreme side?
Wesley: No.
Adam: She wasn't even your Illyria.
Wesley: She's Illyria.
Adam: Oh, please. You have one. And a Fred. And Methos. And Soren. And Faith, if you play your cards right. Oh, and the vampire girl...
Wesley: She doesn't count. You have seven Peters, seven Elles, three Hiros, Jack Harkness and Maggie. And Melissa. And Sark.
Adam: Oh, that's just not right. Some of those Peters and Elles and all of the Hiros are the same. You're counting timelines/universes and fic that has nothing to do with RP. I didn't count Fred twice! Or mention the dead bint. And leave Sark out of it.
Sark: Yes, please. Far, far out of it.
Adam: Aww, puppy, that's not a fun attitude to take.
Sark: You're the one who said it.
Adam: You know I didn't mean it like that...
Wesley: *frustrated, interrupts* I stand by my count. And I'm fairly certain you were flirting with Sylar yesterday.
( Insanity continues below... )